Resentments, Huna and Forgiveness

Posted by on Jan 17, 2012 in Emotional Well-being, Library | 0 comments

by Aleka Thorvalson

“Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.”
~Nelson Mandela

Our resentments take up a lot of our energy. We all have them. Resentment is the animosity, you are harboring against your friend that never paid you back that money they owed you.  It’s that unresolved anger that erupts as you blame (again) your parents for not giving you what you needed, wanted, or deserved. It is that nagging suspicion that you are being lied to and the distrust that follows. It is that unresolved grief you are afraid to feel. Resentment is when you think you are a victim and find yourself repeating, “why does this keep happening to me. I don‘t deserve this“. Resentments are the grudges we are holding or the need for revenge. Resentments surface when we choose being right over happy and seek vindication over peace. They emerge when we judge others or we are offended. Resentments are our habitual thoughts that keep us stuck in the past In fact, our resentments are the very architecture of the ego. They are scaffolding of the story of me.

Nothing on earth consumes a man more quickly than the passion of resentment.”
Friedrich Nietzsche

Resentments drain our authentic power because they keep us firmly in a place of blame, vindication, and righteous anger. We believe we are giving another poison, yet we are the ones sickened.  Imagine one of those soaker garden hoses. You know where there is a slow drip all along the hose through hundreds of tiny holes. You don’t even really notice the water at first, but over time it can flood the garden. That slow drip is your power being drained away and those tiny holes in the hose are your resentments.


The Huna tradition is the ancient spirituality and shamanism of Hawaii, and within it exists a way of personifying the interplay between ourselves and the nature of resentments that is as beautiful as it is profound.  Huna translated means “unseen or hidden side of things” or “the secret knowledge“. Within this teaching there exists a substance called “aka” (translated literally as “to hit or smite with direction”) which is said to be all non-physical matter. It is the potentiality of substance, or field, waiting to be activated and when activated creates endless webs of connection between our physical selves and the world. This activation is achieved through mana (power-energy) or, directed consciousness. Mana, however, can ignite from different mind states or levels of consciousness.  The origination or quality of mana that activates the aka is important because its source decides the outcome. In other words, the intention behind the action determines the quality of the manifestation. According to the Huna Tradition the three mind states where Mana can activate are:

  • The subconscious or unconscious mind of habitual patterns, histories, hidden records, and repetitive default beliefs. Called ‘unihipili in Hawaiian it translates loosely to mean, “consisting of shadowy threads that have the ability to cling like a snare or vine“. The energy doesn’t flow but cling. This is the home of our unconscious life and habitual programming where resentments are a favorite guest.


  • The next level of mind is the conscious mind, which Huna theory defines as a mind state of logic, reason, and thinking. So named ‘uhane it means, “the pipe” or “channel to whisper”. Its function is seen as a way to connect the subconscious and divine mind.


  • The third level of the mind is called makua and it is the divine mind. It is the higher mind that contains all knowledge, intuition, and unconditional love (aloha). It has been translated as “parent” but has a broader meaning as being engaged in a course of dedication to a higher self. This is our connection to our soul as well as the potentialities of our divine purpose as we surrender to our path of authentic expression and expansion.

So, from the Huna perspective resentments are seen as threads of energy infused with mana from our unconscious selves. Imagine your web of resentments and how your soul energy is being siphoned away. It’s a powerful visualization. In the Huna tradition theses drains are the cause of much disease, unrest, fear and thus healing was addressed from the perspective of the nature, amount, and location of these ties.

Resenting someone is a way of never leaving that person.”
-Kara Anderson

The slow leaks do the most damage because we often do not notice them. Sometimes the very sign of their presence is the effects that show up in our lives. From illness to depression, if there is an issue in your life look to your resentments and you can find poison you are swallowing.

When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free.”
– Catherine Ponder

So what do we do with those threads, that web of sticky goo that‘s siphoning off our divine energy? In very literal terms we undo the ties. Some practices use physical means to undo the ties as in traditional Lomi Lomi body work. In addition, one may apply ho’onoponopono which means to, “align or balance, clearing away to the original light, to go home”. It is the path to forgiveness. Interestingly, the word forgiveness in ancient Aramaic means “to cancel, untie or let loose”. So, by forgiving we untie, we let loose, and we detach the energetic binds draining our power.

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.”
-Lewis B. Smedes

What is Forgiveness?

The forgiveness we are speaking about is real forgiveness, not pseudo forgiveness that the ego likes to distract us with. False forgiveness tends to overlook the upset or to appear more righteous (“look at how spiritual I am forgiving you“). Empty forgiveness uses false empathy (“we all are imperfect so I guess I should forgive you”) or even martyrdom (“I‘ll forgive you and then you‘ll owe me”). False forgiveness might even seek revenge (“I’ll forgive you but never forget what you did”). True forgiveness is the only way out of resentment and it is actually not about the other person at all. It is about valuing ourselves enough to have the desire to see the situation differently. In truth, when we really forgive another we do not forgive the person, we forgive what it is bringing up in us. We realize our responsibility, and we note our projections. We forgive because we value our health, our sanity, and our peace of mind more than anything else. It is the loving choice, for us and for the other person.

Remember, our resentments are our limiting and often habitual memes, thoughts, and feelings. This is the way we have been creating our realty up until now. Our mission is to change. With forgiveness we can literally “undo” the power our resentments have over us, because we realize they are triggering something in our mind energy we need to attend to. When we undo them, when we choose to believe differently and when we no longer believe the lies the voice tells us, we transform everything. It is like the scene in the Wizard of Oz where Dorothy reveals the wizard for the charlatan he is. When we dismantle our heavy mask of pain what we are left with is our essence, and the pureness of truth. We are lighter, mentally and physically. When we stop the siphoning off of our power, our inner radiance shines through, like the sun coming out from behind the clouds.

Each time we forgive we acknowledge our worthiness. The truth is, you, the real you, the divine you, has always been worthy. You have never been broken. You have always been radiant, always been amazing, wondrous, and lovely. Your true self only wants the best for you because it knows only perfection. This part of you may feel a bit lost to you right now. This part has been hidden with layers of what we are now undoing, and the light dimmed a bit. We are in the process of finding our way home, of reminding ourselves what it felt like to be free and of reacquainting ourselves with real ourselves. That is what forgiveness has the power to do. When we forgive we regain our alignment with source energy and we can ignite our field of potentiality from this higher perspective. We tap into makua mana, an endless supply of invigorating energy that activates threads of light.  It is in this way that miracles are commonplace and time shifts under our feet.

Here is a tool to help you move from Fear to Love!

Forgiveness Worksheet

“What could you want forgiveness cannot give? Do you want peace? Forgiveness offers it. Do you want happiness, a quiet mind, a certainty of purpose, and a sense of worth and beauty that transcends the world? Do you want care and safety, and the warmth of sure protection always? Do you want a quietness that cannot be disturbed, a gentleness that never can be hurt, a deep, abiding comfort, and a rest so perfect it can never be upset? All this forgiveness offers you, and more. It sparkles on your eyes as you awake, and gives you joy with which to meet the day. It soothes your forehead while you sleep, and rests upon your eyelids so you see no dreams of fear and evil, malice and attack. And when you wake again, it offers you another day of happiness and peace. All this forgiveness offers you, and more.” (ACIM Workbook Lesson 122)


Aleka Thorvalson, Aloha Healing Arts © 2012

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